Here’s an update of a post I wrote last year about self-love for Valentine’s day…
Whether you are happily loved up this Valentine’s day, happily single or actively searching, one things for sure, unless you love yourself it’s going to be more difficult to have a healthy happy relationship with someone else. This may sound a little cosmic but I’d urge you to ask yourself how intact your self-esteem is?
Our children are constantly bombarded with messages of needing to look more ‘cool’, and look up to size zero models. When there’s an increase of self-harming in teenagers, and increasing depression, anxiety and suicide rates – surely our self-loathing has gone too far? I’m not suggesting that we all become vain and arrogant and ‘worship’ ourselves, but we could practice gratitude, a spirit of thankfulness, and recognise that we aren’t born with a lack of self-love. How many babies and young children berate themselves? None! They are immensely pleased with themselves. Low self-esteem is a learned trait, but we can ‘unlearn’ it and if we want to really experience love, it’s essential to practice self-love, or perhaps it would be better to see it as ‘self-care’.
Angela Bradshaw is the author of ‘Be in Balance’ and she says ‘When you practise being kind to yourself as a default ‘attitude’ to life, you can then be happier too – not overburdened or overwhelmed because you are being responsible to yourself first!’
You may have seen the rather odd phenomenon across blogs and documented in the women’s pages of daily newspapers about ‘Mirror fasting’. It’s a new craze started by a blogger who was concerned she was obsessed with her own appearance. But I’d like to encourage everyone to look in the mirror more often – but not in the name of vanity, to worry about your wrinkles, commiserate about greying hairs, or pull faces to tighten your jaw, indeed I think we should be looking in the mirror in order to be appreciative, to show love to ourselves as we really are.
Louise Hay, dubbed ‘The Queen of New Age’ by the New York Times, after writing ‘You Can Heal Your Life’ in 1984, (it’s sold over 35 million copies), owns the extremely successful international publishing company Hay House and is a strong advocate of self-love. Louise believes in affirmations and is a great advocate of what she calls ‘Mirror work’ – looking in the mirror several times a day and saying ‘I love you…..(and add your name). Just try it a few times (in private is fine) and you’ll realise how tricky it can feel. Most of us are so conditioned from an early age to be self-critical, and have low self-esteem because we feel we don’t look ‘attractive’ enough or we’re not in some way ‘good’ enough.
Hay House author David Hamilton has written books on kindness including the excellent book ‘The Five Side Effects of Kindness’, and he looked at the science of how the mind affects the body in his book ‘I Heart Me’. David says…
‘It’s so hard for most people (to love themselves) for two reasons. One is that they don’t know what self-love actually means, which makes it difficult knowing what to aim for, and two, that a lack of self-love is deep-rooted; mostly it’s a consequence of learning and experiences in the first 6 or 7 years of life.
One simple trick, that doesn’t require any effort like thinking positively, is to notice your body language. Your muscles always betray how you feel about yourself as you go about your day. So, at least 2 or 3 times a day, simply notice how you’re sitting, standing, walking, or interacting. Then shift your body language to something that says you feel good about yourself. If you do this consistently, you will start to shape your brain wiring for a more healthy sense of self-love.’
So if you are feeling a bit ‘Billy no-mates’ this Valentine’s day treat yourself to some self -love – go on…you’re worth it!
Deborah McPhilemy believes that every success, every great business deal, every bit of happiness, joy and love stems from relationships, whether that relationship is with yourself, with others or with your higher self.
Deborah is a Relationship Empowerment Author and Speaker and she merges Spirit with Science to help people have, or create, relationships they love. She empowers with knowledge, tools and skills to improve relationships and resolve or avoid conflicts.
Going through periods of her own very dark depression, along the way Deborah studied Emotional Intelligence, Mind Power, Human Behaviour / Psychology, Metaphysics, Quantum Physics, Quantum Touch, NLP, PNI and Literacy and has created a blueprint called the ‘7 Selfie System’ that anyone can use to improve or turn their relationships around, it can be taught to anyone from 4 to 94 years old! Deborah does not pass on ANY information or skills without personally having tried and benefited from it herself.
Her expertise lies in understanding human behaviour and helping people get rid of their self-doubt, anxiety and fears and instil within them a deep sense of self-belief, she believes strongly in self-empowerment so everything she teaches and writes about is to empower people with skills, tools and knowledge to help themselves.
Deborah’s valuable tools and teachings are accessible as an online program called ‘7 Selfies that Make All Your Relationships Great’ – for couples, singles, parents and families who want to enjoy deeper connections and have more love, passion and joy in life.
More information on how Deborah can help you move forward with your life can be found at www.deborahmcphilemy.com
OUR 2017 AWARDS ARE OPENING 14th FEBRUARY 2017
For Natural, Eco, and Organic Products and Services
Entries will be open for the coveted prestigious JANEY LOVES Annual PLATINUM Awards, presented for excellence and innovation in Natural Organic or Eco products, Alternative Treatments and Therapies. The Awards continue to bring the best of the best in natural products and services into the mainstream.
Award entries are selected after ‘real life’ testing by our panel of Judges and consumer votes.
We are lining up our incredible panel of judges and are thrilled to welcome once again, TV presenter and ‘voice coach to the stars’ Carrie Grant and UK’s leading expert in women’s nutritional health Marilyn Glenville to our 2017 judging panel. Watch this space for future announcements on who will be joining us!
I am delighted to be invited again to be part of the judging panel for The Platinum Awards. It is great to be championing natural and organic products and awarding innovative brands with the recognition they deserve.
Dr Marilyn Glenville PhD
Our 2017 Award Categories:
HEALTH AND WELLBEING
MOTHER AND BABY
FOOD AND DRINK
PRACTITIONERS AND THERAPIES
HOME/GARDEN AND PETS
CLOTHING AND ACCESSORIES
WELLBEING CHARITIES AWARD
NATURAL AND ECO STORES
ETHICAL AND ECO SERVICES
WINNERS ANNOUNCED ON 7TH JULY 2017
Watch this space for updates!
Are you one of the people who is counting the days till the end of dry January? Maybe you identify with Chris Evans who said this week…’I don’t care if I’m two stone lighter, I’m miserable, every day feels the same!’
I work with Chris at Radio 2 and in fact worked with him years ago, when we were both at Virgin Radio as it was then (in fact he owned it for a while!). He was always a guy who could hold his beer and be discerning about a fine wine so it’s probably not surprising that he is finding dry January taxing.
So I wonder how Chris will ‘celebrate’ on Feb 1st and if you have also given up the booze for January what will February and the rest of the year look like for you from a drinking perspective?
Many people fall into a cycle of ‘binge-detox-binge’ which can be bad for us emotionally and physically. Dr Max Pemberton wrote in The Mail
“I disagree with the underlying premise of dry January – the idea that you can make up for drinking too much over Christmas. It seems that the first month of the year always sends people a bit weird. They tend to forget everything they’ve been told about basic biology and nutrition”
He believes a few weeks of abstaining doesn’t make up for over-indulging the rest of the year. His recommendation is to do a detox only if it will have some meaningful impact on your health, most of us are aware of the damage too much alcohol can do, and there has been campaigns lately to encourage us to ‘love our liver’ but still we are far from being a temperate nation.
The reality is that none of us really know what to believe about alcohol, there are SO many different studies and reports. The Government recommendations of the amount of units we should drink across a week are really just a guess, we read reports that say alcohol in moderation is good for you, then a recent report from the Journal of American College of Cardiology says that drinking just one drink a day can be bad for your heart, they say one glass of wine or beer increased the risk of abnormal heart rhythm by eight per cent.
One thing is for certain, we live in a drinking society, it’s very social to drink, there are pubs on every corner, it’s part of our culture, and for those of us that do drink it’s not going to go away. So how would it be if we could drink with confidence, drink if we choose to, but ‘manage’ the alcohol rather than the alcohol ‘managing’ us? There is a big difference between an addict and someone who has got caught up in a habit, and for most people who drink too much it’s exactly that – a habit.
No human being was born with a taste for the hard stuff, we ‘learned’ to drink, and just as we learnt the habit we can ‘unlearn’ it or at least take control. We drink for many reasons – stress, boredom, anger, loneliness, fear, to communicate, to numb ourselves from sadness or grief, and when we established a habit of drinking, our unconscious mind which acts like a kind of reference library, ‘filed’ that action under …’that made me feel better quickly’.
Come February or any other month when you have woken up wishing you hadn’t tried to handle your drink like a fruit fly (apparently they have an astonishing alcohol threshold due to their genetic makeup), you will no doubt be saying to yourself…’I will have an alcohol free day, or I will drink only one glass of wine or have only one beer’, only to find yourself tapping away on the computer at 9pm astonished at where that bottle of wine went…. Thinking …’What happened to my resolve? ‘
Typically, you then enter into another spiral of waking during the night berating yourself for not having enough willpower and vowing to do better the next day and so it goes on….
How would you feel if I told you that nagging feeling you have that’s it’s all going to go pear shaped again once February comes around, can be changed forever? There’s no magic ‘I don’t like the taste of alcohol anymore’ pill of course, but there absolutely is the most amazing Hypnosis programme created by world renowned hypnotherapist and top selling author Georgia Foster.
Georgia is also an international speaker and creator of life changing programmes, she uses hypnosis, the window of the ‘between awake and sleep states’, where your mind can absorb at a much faster state, the alpha and theta state to train the unconscious mind, she believes we all have an incredible mind, and whether you want to learn how to drink less alcohol, improve your self-esteem, calm your mind or find love, she believes she can help. She has created the ‘7 Days to Drink Less’ online programme and it’s really effective. She won’t be trying to convince you to give up alcohol, in fact she says it doesn’t matter how much you are drinking… you can trust your phenomenal mind.
At her workshops, she encourages anyone who had a boozy night planned not to cancel, she believes you can make changes, and with hypnosis you can make these changes so much faster, you can shape your emotional relationship with yourself. Instead of allowing those inner voices – our inner critic to come in and convince us that we really do need our third or fourth drink because last time it obliterated the feeling of what was really going on….she recommends we listen to one of her recordings, a twenty five minute session which can be done anywhere, (but you must be stationary and preferably lying down), and over time (hopefully over seven days) you will have a different attitude, which is not linked to struggle or willpower but to the intuitive healthy confident part of you that recognises that doing irreparable damage to your liver, and embarrassing yourself because you are hungover is probably not the best form of ‘self-care’.
Georgia, who has featured in The Mail, The Times, and on Sky News believes we need to shut off our ‘inner critic’ so instead of the feeling of being ‘radio crazy’ with a constant inner dialogue of…’I must have another drink so I feel brave enough to…. I’d better load up on some Dutch courage before I make that phone call’… You listen to positive thoughts and suggestions which ‘re-programme’ your unconscious mind to know it’s safe to drink less alcohol.
She suggests we get back in touch with the healthy intuitive confident part of who we are.
This is not a ‘quit the drink for good’ programme, no sir. With my imperfectly natural approach that’s why I love it! – Georgia having once been a heavy drinker, who has ‘been there and got the T shirt’ still drinks now, and she doesn’t suggest you stop either, (unless you really want to). She believes you can train your mind to keep the ‘fun’ bits of choosing to drink alcohol but not the bits that cause you emotional grief, or the sense of...I have a drinking problem,’ – when it starts to impact on your life.
What we now know is that the brain is adaptable to change, Georgia says ‘remember it’s a thinking problem not a drinking problem’. The great thing about Georgia’s 7-day programme is that not only does it impact on your drinking, it makes you feel more calm and confident also.
Georgia and I are going to be doing some work together developing programmes (watch this space) so I love the fact that she believes ‘you need to honour the authentic you’.
If you know intuitively that you are putting a strain on your body, trying just a bit too hard to ‘hold your beer; or keep up with the lads, or drown your sorrows’ now is the time to take back control.
My gift to you (and I hope you will come back to me and tell me how liberating it was for you) is to jack you up a 25 per cent discount on Georgia’s 7-day programme – I’M NOT ON COMMISSION!! I’m offering this because I can see the benefit so clearly and I know there are people who after just a few days of listening to this hypnosis audio will think differently about their desire and ‘need’ to drink too much.
You can get 25 per cent off Georgia’s ‘7 Days to Drink Less’ online programme HERE>>
It’s that time when many of us are busy joining gyms, vowing to go on a diet (starting tomorrow), giving up alcohol for the month, promising ourselves we will get up earlier, be on time….whatever it is we feel we ought to change, this is the month for setting ourselves up to fail.
My suggestion is NOT to try and set resolutions, instead focus on getting more of what you want – and what you want to give. Ask yourself what’s my vision for the future? Most of the people I work with are ‘heart centred’ business owners, that means they aren’t coming from a place of wanting to earn fortunes, or run an empire, they often have a skill, a gift, they know that their product or service can make a difference, and they really genuinely want to serve. All good, right? Well yes, so long as they have also looked at what they want – what’s the big dream?
Often those of us with holistic businesses, especially those of us who are passionate about sharing our message with a wider audience forget to look after ourselves; and our own needs and desires, sometimes we even forget why we are doing it all! The start of a new year is a great time to review what you have been doing, get real clarity on what you want for your life and your business, and ask yourself – as a key person of influence what do I want to achieve this year – and importantly why?
I speak to lots of clients who – without realising it, are aiming too small, when asked what they really want for their work, their answer will be …I want to earn enough to give up the day job…or I want to reach more people because I know I can help them…. Sadly, neither of those statements give a clear message to the fairy godmother / genie / universe – of exactly what outcome you want.
Be specific; create a vision board instead of a set of resolutions, remember the left brain right brain connection and use both words and pictures.
Here’s some questions you can ask yourself to get you started…
How can I get in touch with and ‘own’ my YOU-nique Brilliance?
(Yes, I do believe in singing your own praises – not playing small)
Have I got clarity on my brand message, and which parts of my story I want to share?
(Often the personal bit that you don’t want to share is actually your ‘gold’. I love the saying ‘Let your mess be your message’)
Who are my ideal clients, if I want to focus on attracting and helping one ‘niche’ to start with, who is that person and why?
(You may think your product or service is genuinely perfect for everyone, but for your first ‘project’ choose one specific client group)
If I could have one big wish for 2017 for my business what would it be?
(Be specific, think big)
What can I do right now to move towards this outcome? Do I need to contact someone or get more training / investment / a joint venture?
Remember you don’t have to get it right…you absolutely DO have to get it going…
If you’d like help getting clarity on your unique vision… spend 60 mins of ’1 to 1′ with me for a power visioning strategy session to get the clarity you need to move you and your business forward in 2017.
It was a joy to speak at the Hay House Writers Workshop 2016. I was offering some insights into the importance of recognising that ‘You’ are the Brand and how to get your message out to a wider audience.
The main act of the weekend alongside Michelle Pilley from Hay House UK, was the wonderful Julia Cameron, the author, artist, poet, playwright, filmmaker, and composer. Apart from being once married to Martin Scorsese she is most famous for her book ‘The Artists Way’ which has sold over 4 million copies and to this day remains a classic on the bookshelves of anyone who wants to expand their creativity.
Julia is a fantastic workshop leader giving us great insights into how to kick-start our creativity and this is what she believes:
“The bedrock tool of a creative recovery is a daily practice called Morning Pages”
She believes it’s imperative to write what she calls ‘Morning Pages’. It’s literally that –at least 3 pages of longhand every morning, preferably when you first wake up. I’m guessing you had to go back and re-read that – yes, I did say ‘longhand’ i.e. handwriting – remember that? No laptops, tablets or phones, good old fashioned pen, and paper! There’s something unique about letting the words flow onto a page. Julia reminded us that there is no right way or wrong way to do it (and yes you can have a cup of coffee) but you must write everything that comes into your head, don’t think about it, or edit, or assess, just write, and don’t show them to anyone, they are only for you.
Unsure what to write? Just write anyway, it’s a stream of consciousness, it might include…Oops forgot to send a birthday card to Dawn…I’m feeling excited if apprehensive about my next big speaking gig…why did I have that second glass of wine, I haven’t a clue what to wear when it’s this cold…I so don’t want to go to the gym…
You get the idea! It can be about nothing…and everything and interestingly the act of writing it down is very cathartic and brings peace. It’s rather like a creative form of meditation, but where as many of us find meditation ‘difficult’ because we are trying NOT to have thoughts, the idea here is to ‘download’ as many as possible. In fact, Julia says spirituality and creativity are intrinsically linked.
If you are a writer, Julia believes you are also a critic and she believes this simple daily practice helps you over time to choose positive attitudes, to let all the thoughts flow you must ask your critic to step aside, and let’s face it in the search for perfection, many of us are literally silenced by our inner voices most of the time.
I’ve lost count of the clients who tell me they know they should write their book, create their online course, blog more regularly, share their story, but procrastination, fear of being judged is holding them back.
Give it a shot, if you are currently trying to make some sense of your life and work it’s one of the best tools I know to fast-track you to clarity and to get those creative juices flowing. Julia often finds that when people start committing to writing their morning pages their other writing, whether that be a book, blog, or essays, flows more effortlessly.
If you are a successful entrepreneur it could help you gain clarity on your authentic message, if you’d like to write a book it’s a great way to start – remember my favourite saying ‘You don’t have to get it right, you just have to get it going’.
I can help you move forward, no more holding back! I want to invite you to create success for your life, career or business and learn the secrets for getting SEEN HEARD and SOLD, Join me and my special guest on this one-day inspirational intensive workshop – Janey Lee Grace
Book now to reserve your place! (please note that there are limited places available).
Early Bird price £147 (save £100)
What kind of impression do you make on other people? And I wonder if you’ve ever asked yourself who was the person who made the greatest impression on you? The person who encouraged you? inspired you – or just made you think differently? Often people say it was a particularly enthusiastic teacher, or a relative who saw their potential.
We interviewed Jeremy Paxman recently, he has written his memoirs and of course he is both loved and hated in equal measures, he is known for his acerbic wit, he is irascible, grumpy and awkward and of course relentless at getting the answers he wants, even from the most ‘agenda-driven’ politicians and celebrities.
The boot was on the other foot as we interviewed him and there was lots of joshing. ‘That’s not a question…it’s an assertion’… He responded to several of our questions but we asked him who had been the most impressive person he had ever interviewed? Who had left a lasting impression?
His answer surprised me, “The Dalai Lama” he said “incredible guy” (I’m guessing he meant his energy), but Jeremy said we did the interview and then he left the studio and Jeremy said to his crew ‘What an amazing man’… Just then a little bald head appeared round the door….” I’ve lost my treasures” he said “I must have left them behind…I can’t leave without them” …” Well come in… lets search”. “What do they look like?” Paxo asked. They’re in a tiny purple bag he said – the tall presenter crawled under the table. He found the little drawstring bag and handed it over. The Dalai Lama thanked him, put his hand into the bag and with his fist tightly closed said …” You must have one’ … “no I couldn’t possibly”. Paxo said. “I insist” said the Dalai Lama, he opened his hand and handed him one of the treas
Now what are you thinking at this point (if you didn’t hear the interview). What were his treasures, crystals…diamonds…special stones…coins?
No – it was a golden wrapped toffee. Paxo has kept it for years.
It’s the little things that can make the biggest impression.
Our JANEY LOVES 2016 Platinum Award winners are announced!
A huge thank you to our sponsors of the 2016 Platinum Awards:
AEOS (Active Energised Organic Skincare)
UK Health Radio
The Taymount Clinic
Health Triangle Magazine
And to our fabulous judges…
I’ve been lucky enough to have been in the number one spot three years in a row now and this year I’ve slipped down just a bit, but thank you SO much to those who voted for me, some huge congratulations to the winners and I’m super thrilled that Jayn Sterland MD of one of my favourite companies Weleda is topping the bill this year.
The hotlist – voted for by the natural and organic beauty industry is a snapshot of the leading personalities driving the newest trends and best products on the natural and organic market.
Here’s the 2016 top 25 personalities:
1. Jayn Sterland – Weleda
2. Sonia White – Lovelula
3. Luke & Kirstie Sherrif – Pinks Boutique
4. Kim & Alexander Barani – Kinetic Enterprises
5. Graeme Hume – Pravera
6. Ben Wigley – Big Green Smile
7. Tabitha James Kraan – Tabitha James Kraan
8. Sarah Brown – Pai Skincare
9. Francesca Morgante – NATRUE
10. Dr Cristina Llamas-Rey – Naturisimo
11. Fiona Konarides – Beauty Shortlist
12. Janey Lee Grace – broadcaster & journalist
13. Catkin Wemyss-Bodmer – BRYT Skincare
14. Noelle O’Connor – TanOrganic
15. Imelda Burke – Content Beauty
16. Kate Humble – Humble Beauty / broadcaster
17. Amber Felce – AmbersBeautyTalk.com
18. Jo Chidley – Beauty Kitchen
19. Dr Mariano Spiezia – Inlight Organic Skincare
20. Michell Thew – Cruelty Free International
21. Lauren Bartley – Soil Association
22. Rebecca Goodyear – Biteablebeauty.com
23. Sarah Stacey – author and editor
24. Lorraine Dallmeier – Formula Botanica
25. Sascha Layne – Freshious Life & Beauty
I’m absolutely thrilled to be part of bringing great natural beauty products into the mainstream.
The Natural Beauty Retail Awards 2016
I love to see natural beauty products being made more available to a wider market and Waitrose, Debenhams, Holland & Barrett, LoveLula, Beauty Kitchen, and Amaranth have all been recognised in the Natural Beauty Retail Awards which highlights the valuable contributions and support of retailers. These Awards celebrate the industry’s dedication and innovations in offering their customers a great retail experience, at the same time as promoting natural and organic beauty for all.
The Natural Beauty Retail Awards 2016 winners are:
Best Supermarket – Waitrose
Best Chain Store – Holland & Barrett
Best Department Store – Debenhams
Best Online Retailer – Lovelula
Best Branded Store – Beauty Kitchen
Best Independent Retailer – Amaranth
Formerly The Natural Beauty Yearbook, Natural Beauty News is the definitive trade publication for the natural and organic beauty industry. It covers the best in seasonal trends whilst also retaining the Yearbook’s most popular elements, such as Retailers Choice and the ‘Who’s Who’ in Natural Beauty.
For further information, please visit:
JLG Media Relations
TERMS AND CONDITIONS
Janey’s Other Websites